It is hard to be treated as no-one.  I grew up being treated as someone who was getting it all wrong.  I was treated as if everything I believed in, did not matter.  How I was behaving was wrong, from the start, with no consideration.  I had to live by someone else’s rules.  But I was never able to live up to that standard… because that was not me.

And of course, it did not work well for me.  And it does not work any better today.  When people treat me differently… for whatever the reason… I feel that past creeping into my life.  It does not matter who I am, it only matters how I behave.  I can not live that way.  It almost destroyed my life.  I am not always as I appear to be… no-one is.

I work very hard at treating everyone the same as I have always.  I can not understand their situation if I predetermine how things will go.  I am not always successful… but I try.  I know I should not treat people by my simple interpretations of how they are behaving.  I wish I could do better at doing this.  It’s not fair to presume how people will behave because of outside circumstances.

I try.  I want to treat people according to who they are on the inside – always.  Not according to how they may be reacting to things I can’t know.  Everyone has issues going on in their brains, that I can not possibly know about… no matter how close we may be.

I lived as a shadow of what I could have been in my life.  I will not ever attain what I could have done.  I am what I am, and treating me otherwise will result in a disconnect.  I have been thru enough.

SO… I will NOT be treated differently than I am.  No-one has the perception to know where my brain is.  Listen.

NOTE:: There are some issues I have a hard time being patient with no matter what.  Politics can be one of them.  I do not have the strength to fight some battles.  I pick and choose.