I used to say this a lot around this time of year.  I probably still would if I was around people much.  I do not like my birthday – I do not remember ever liking it much.

I do not know why.

The closer I get to my birthday, the more invisible I become.  I go off social media, and turn off my phone.  The last thing I want is to have people wishing me a Happy Birthday.  I hide.  It really does help.  But it is not a lasting solution…

I have not worked on this problem – it only comes up once a year, so it’s not such a bad thing.  It has been easy to let it slide.  And a couple of days from now, it will not be a problem again.  It will slip away for another year.

There have been very nice birthdays… one party when I was 22 was great.  Since then… not so much.  This is entirely my fault.  I hide, and do not let people get close around my birthday.  I say I do not want anything… because that is how I feel.  So the good intentions, and even efforts, of others, get blocked.

Things are what they are, and I just need to relax, and ignore…